Repentance

Christmas is almost here. We have about two more weeks. I can’t believe it. Elder Daniel Ribble comes home on December 18th. Any of you have any good news or know of any good news, please share them with us or email them to me and I’ll post them. In fact, if you have anything that you would like me to add to share, feel free to email me and I’ll be glad to post your comments on the blog. My email address is utahgalkelly@roadrunner.com. We would love to hear from you. Your experiences are ours.

Our discussion on Sunday was on Repentance (Chapter 19) given by Bunny Kantro. If don’t have your manual, go and get it and follow along. I’ll wait! … Got it! O.k., here we go, page 107.

We All Need to Repent:
What is sin? What effects do our sins have on us? We came to earth to grow and progress. During our lifelong journey, we all sin which is why we all need to repent. The Lord relates the following to Adams, “Wherefore teach it unto your children, that all men, everywhere, must repent, or they can in nowise inherit the kingdom of God, for no unclean thin can dwell there, or dwell in his presence” (Moses 6:57). Many of us sin through our weakness while we are going through our trails. However, some of us sin for other reasons like ignorance. And other times, we sin because of willful disobedience. In Ecclesiastes 7:20, it says, “…there is not a just man upon earth, that doeth good, and sinneth not” and that “…if we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us” (1 John 1:8).

So in answers to our first questions, What is Sin? James 4:17 says, “To him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin”. In 1 John 5:17 and 1:8, describes sins as “all unrighteousness” and “the transgression of the law”. “All men, everywhere must repent,” (Moses 6:57) says the Lord except for Jesus because he lived a perfect life. However, he did pave the way and paid the price for us to have the wonderful opportunity for repent for our sins. What a great gift that is.

Becoming Free from Our Sins through Repentance:
What is repentance? Repentance is a way for us to become clean from our sins. Having sin upon us slow us down from progressing spiritually so having the opportunity to repent, we can continue to grow spiritually and prepare ourselves to meet our Heavenly Father. President Joseph Fielding Smith said, “I have suffered pain, you have suffered pain, and sometimes it has been quite severe; but I cannot comprehend pain…that would cause the blood, like sweat, to come out upon the body. It was something terrible, something terrific…” Bruce R. McConkie says, “…there was no man ever born into this world that could have stood under the weight of the load that was upon the Son of God, when he was carrying my sins and your and making it possible that we might escape from our sins” (Doctrines of Salvations, sel. Bruce R. McConkie, 3 vols. [1954-56], 1:130–31]. Sometimes repenting can be very difficult. It may require courage and strength, lots of tears and “unceasing” prayers. Repentance also requires change too and living the commandments.

Principles of Repentance
What are the principles of repentance? President Spencer W. Kimball said, “There is no royal road to repentance, no privileged path to forgiveness. Every man must follow the same course whether he be rich or poor, educated or untrained, tall or short, prince or pauper, king or commoner” (Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Spencer W. Kimball [2006], 38). No one is excluded from having to follow the same road. How many of us know people who think this principle does not apply to them. I know I do! Everyone must follow the same rules of forgiveness regardless of who they are. On this road, there are steps that we must take in order for us to achieve true repentance.

1) We must Recognize Our Sins – That is probably the most important step. We must acknowledge we have done something wrong. If we cannot do that, then we cannot move onto the next step. As Dr. Phil says, “What you don’t acknowledge, you can’t change”. How true is that! In Alma 42:29-30 it says, “…Let your sins trouble you, with that trouble which shall bring you down unto repentance…Do not endeavor to excuse yourself in the least point”. As part of us acknowledging our sins is to stop blaming our parents or others, making excuses or justifying what we do as being all right. How many of us hear others say, “Well, they do it! Or “Everybody does it now!” You can find scriptures to that in Luke 16:15-16. Louise Ribble made the statement that “you can blame your parents for getting into trouble, however, you can only blame yourself for staying there. Wow! That’s something to be remembered. As some point, we all must take responsibility for our own behavior and our own action and our own forgiveness.

2) We must Feel Sorrow for Our Sins – In the second part, we must be truly sorry and feel for sorrow. Our sorrows cannot be in vain; they must be sincere. Saying we’re sorry and then moving on is not having true remorse. How many of us know someone who is always sorry, but never seems to stop committing the sin. As the manual says, “We must feel that our sins are terrible. We must want to unload and abandon them” (pg 110). Keys words here are unload and abandon. In D&C 20:37, it says, “All those who humble themselves before God, and desire to be baptized, and come forth with broken hearts and contrite spirits, and … have truly repented of all their sins, shall be received by baptism into his church”. Here’s a questions that the manual asks us: In what ways do you think “godly sorrow” is different from expressions of regret? To learn more about that, study 2 Corinthians 7:9-10 and Mormon 2:10-14.

3) We Must Forgave Our Sins – D&C 58:43 says, “By this ye may know if a man repenteth of his sins-behold, he will confess them and forsake them”. So in other words, step three is forsaking the sin. We must stop what we are doing. That requires us having to change our behavior. If we are asking for forgiveness for lying or stealing, then we must stop lying and stop stealing; if we’ve committed adultery, we must stop the affair and do it no more. This is very important for us to understand. I think many people don’t realize that we really need to change what we have done. Change is hard but it is necessary for us in order for us to achieve the full gift of forgiveness.

4) We must Confess Our Sins - For smaller sins, we can simply go to the Lord himself and confess through him. If we have injured a person, then we must apologize and ask for their forgiveness and try to make the wrong right if possible. However, for the bigger sins, we need the help from our Bishop. Big sins would be like selling or using drugs and acts as fornication, adultery and homosexual relationship. In D&C 61:2, it says, “I, the Lord, forgive sins, and am merciful unto those who confess their sins with humble hearts”

5) We Must Make Restitution – As in part 4, we must make the wrong right if possible. Now sometimes, that can’t always be done but when it can, we must correct the wrong. As example, a person who has stolen, must return what he has stolen and a liar, must make the truth known. If a person has destroyed a person character, they must do what they could to restore their name. As we do this, our Heavenly Father will not remember no more come judgment day. For scripture reference to that, we can see Ezekiel 33:15-16.

6) We Must Forgive Others – This may be the hardest one yet. A vital part of the forgiveness progress is to forgive the one who has sinned against us. This is not always easy to do. However if we want to be forgiven of our sins, we must forgive others. Our hearts have to be cleansed from all hate, bitterness and ill feelings of others. “Wherefore, I say unto you, that ye ought to forgive one another; for he that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses standeth condemned before the Lord; for there remaineth in him the greater sin” (D&C 64:9 and 3 Nephi 13:14-15). This is no easy task to do so don’t yourself unworthy if you are struggling with it. I think at some point of our lives, we will all struggle with having to forgive someone who has deeply hurt us or continues to hurt us on daily basis. It may be a spouse, an ex spouse, a parent, a relative, in-law, a co-worker or even our own child. And many times, we can’t just walk away from this person or the situation such as a parent, or a co-worker. Many times, the curve in the learning process of forgiveness is learning how to deal with such a person and that requires the help, I believe, from our Heavenly Father. Only he really knows what is going on inside of their soul and trying to learn that compassion and understanding such Jesus had is not an easy skill to learn and master. Bunnie brought up her experience with her ex-husband. She explains the anger that she had towards her ex and how she had that anger for years. She would wish bad things would happen to him. It took her years to finally forgive him. I can relate. I know when my first marriage broke up, I was very angry with my ex for abandoning my son and I. I felt a lot of hatred that my life suddenly changed from being parentless to suddenly being a single parent and a divorce at the age of 23 while my ex-husband still got to date, be free and single with no responsibility to think of. At 23, my life should be just beginning but instead, I’m working temp jobs, struggling to survive and support my son and I with no help from my ex. Yes, I was angry for several years and like Bunnie, I too wished bad things would happen to him. As Denise Robbins, “It’s a process”…we don’t achieve this over night. These feeling that we have are real and we have them for a reason. It’s to let us know that the pain and the sorrow that one has inflicted upon us; that there was an injustice done to us. I think the other thing to note about forgiving others is to stop talking about it and bringing it up. The more we bring it up, the more we keep it alive in our hearts. Plus, if you think about it, every time we bring it up, we are “reliving that pain” all over again, keeping the wound fresh. Dietre Bowen make a really good point too that want to share with you. She said in her experience of forgiving others or a person, while she was going through this process, she got to a point where she felt nothing towards this person who wronged. Yes, she still had the memory but she no longer felt the pain of the memory. As Louise said, “We can’t control the memory, but [if you can] you can disconnect yourself from that person, situation or whatever it may be”. However, there may be times when we can’t just disconnect ourselves but if we can, then we need to do so. Time does heal all wounds. If you need to talk to someone who can help you through the process, then by all means, seek the help.

7) We Must Keep the Commandments of God – The final step is keeping the commandments of the Lord (D&C 1:32). President Kimball said, “First, one repents. Having gained that ground he then must live the commandments of the Lord to retain his vantage point. This is necessary to secure complete forgiveness” (Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Spencer W. Kimball, 43).

How Repentance Helped Us:
In what ways does repentance help us? Well, as we repent, we became free from the bondage of sin. Alma shares his repenting experience with us in the scriptures, Alma 36:12-14, 17-21, “My soul was harrowed up [troubled] to the greatest degree and racked with all my sins. Yea, I did remember all my sins and [iniquities], for which I was [tormented] with the pains of hell; yea I saw that I had rebelled against my God, and that I had not kept his holy commandments…So great had been my [iniquities], that the very thought of coming into the presence of my God had rack my soul with [inexpressible horror]. …It came to pass that as I was …harrowed up by the memory of my many sins, behold, I remembered also to have heard my father prophesy…concerning the coming of one Jesus Christ, a Son of God, to atone for the sins of the world. Now, as my mind caught hold upon this thought, I [cried] within my heart: O Jesus, thou Son of God, have mercy on me…And now , behold, when I thought this, I could remember my [pains no more]…And oh, what [joy], and what [marvelous light] I did behold: yea, my soul was filled with joy as exceeding as was my pain! …There can be nothing so [exquisite] and sweet as was my joy”

The Dangers of Procrastinating Our Repentance
What are some possible consequence of procrastinating our repentance?
The prophets, past and present, have warned us over and over again, that this life is the time for us to be repenting (Alma 34:32). We must repent daily, morning and evening so that we can continue on the path of eternal life.

This is such an important lesson. If you have not read it yet, please take the time to do so. Repentance is such an important step for us in returning to our Heavenly Father and it is also the hardest for many of us to do. There may be times that even when we hurt or offend a person and we ask for their forgiveness, they will not forgive us. We must understand that as long as we have done all we can to do to made amends, then our part if complete. If they choose to not forgive us, then that is on their heads. Please feel free to share your thoughts on Repentance with us. We would love to hear from you. You just might uplift someone who may need to read about your experiences. Next week our discussion will be on Baptism, Chapter 20 and given to us by Marietta Sperry. Please be sure to join us. Until that time, take some time and read ahead. Enjoy, and thanks for reading. Until next time…

Kelly